Skip to content

Depression Strikes

May 13, 2011

Just when everything in my life was slowly getting a wee bit better…

I had a really good day. Filled with nothing but nice things. Joy, love brimming outta me.

Late night I crashed. Din’t know what hit me.

Cried and cried and then cried some more.

Nothing made sense. I wanted nothing as badly as death.

Still I hadn’t lost sense. I just knew what I wanted. To be out. Out from pain that was crushing me.

Hours of crying. Not being able to sleep.

Somewhere in there I slipped off into sleep.

Woke up in the morning. This was not my usual crying then refreshed, all that pain into tears crying. I could still cry. In a second. Still tired. Still hurting.

I knew I needed help.

So here starts my journey with anti-depressants.

I just kept putting it off, thinking I had sadness that could be brushed off.

Well its not brushing off so with exams closing in and no way that I can do much about depressing forces.

Been a coupla days into my Sertralin + Bupropion (= Zoloft + Wellbutrin)

First few days

cons

  • been so absolutely jittery
  • fingers trembling
  • slight tremor of the jaw at odd times
  • a wee bit of palpitations

pros

  • I’m alert
  • focused
  • studying
  • happy
  • content
  • non- lethargic
  • not thought much about sleep
  • not too hungry
  • not sad
  • most importantly = NOT CRYING and in the dumps
  • something awake in me

Hope Mom doesn’t notice the tremors. Not all that much but they come and go infrequently.

Anyway expecting adverse effects bouncing off in a coupla more days as my system gets used to it. Or I would be thinking of reducing the dose initially.

There are a lot of things to thank God for. Right now for me, its Anti-depressants. 🙂 Thank you Lord.

Advertisements
8 Comments leave one →
  1. Grey Goose, Dirty permalink
    May 13, 2011 4:46 PM

    Good for you for deciding they were the right thing for you now. Sounds as if they are helping, so that is wonderful!

  2. May 13, 2011 5:22 PM

    I hope you’re also thanking yourself for having the wisdom to see the right path, and taking it! That’s an incredibly difficult thing, so props to you 🙂

  3. Karen Pearce permalink
    May 24, 2011 10:45 PM

    Good luck with the meds 🙂 x

  4. June 2, 2011 7:50 AM

    😦 I so relate….. Keep writing… I really needed to read this post tonight!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: